food

Oh, deer

/ sweetsaraline

My father prefers fishing over hunting. It’s just more fun to be on a boat on the lake when the water is calmly reflecting the brilliant sun. Hunting, though? He technically can’t go anymore, but that doesn’t bother him. It’s probably been at least 30 years since he went and he doesn’t miss it. That doesn’t mean that he doesn’t appreciate it when a friend goes hunting and brings back a treat for him, though. I’m just putting that out there in case any of his friends are reading this.

Today we set our scene in a townhouse in the late 1980s. Lunch time is coming up fast and my dad has been looking forward to the venison that his friend gave him. It is in the fridge wrapped in tinfoil. He opens the door and pulls the silver corners of the wrapping open and pulls a piece of meat out. He takes a bite.

Delicious. That’s what it is, deeeeelicious. He thinks to himself, Hey, you know who might like this? My five-year-old daughter.

There is really no way for him to know that I watched Bambi for the first time at Aunt Shirley’s house yesterday.

My father calls me over.

“Here, try some of this. You might like it.”

I look at the meat with interest. “What is it?”

“It’s deer meat,” he says.

I recoil and shake my head, frowning.

“Come on, it’s yummy,” he insists.

“No, I don’t want it.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t like deer meat.”

“How do you know if you don’t try it?”

I shake my head again.

My father is running out of convincing things to say. It’s time to pull out the big guns. It’s time to bust out his favourite Pink Floyd lyrics.

“If you don’t eat your meat, you can’t have any pudding,” he says.

I stare at him. Tears are beginning to form in my eyes.

My dad puts on a silly accent and says, “How can you have any puuuudinnggg if you don’t eat your meat?”

That’s when I burst out with, “I don’t want to eat Bambi’s mom!” The tears are rolling down my cheeks and my eyes are glistening as I look up at him.

This is a plot twist that my father was not expecting. He quietly wraps the deer meat up in the tinfoil and puts it back in the fridge.

Garden Star of the week: Basil

/ sweetsaraline

Basil is a fragrant and versatile choice for your garden. Although the plants are difficult to start from seed, once you have one, all you have to do is stick it in the ground outside and leave it alone. Since it repels some insect pests and since it is tasty, it makes a great companion for tomatoes in the garden and on your plate. It’s also a good companion for pizza, pasta, and ricotta cheese, especially if the ricotta cheese is in a lasagna, which is actually the real reason why basil is the Garden Star 🌟 of the week. Nom nom nom, basil!

This simple s’mores hack could save your camping trip!

/ sweetsaraline

Hello, welcome, and thank you for clicking on my click baity title. Here is a long explanation about what s’mores are, even though you probably already know because you clicked on the link and you want to find out what the hack is. Don’t worry, I’m going to tell you, right after I make you scroll through ten paragraphs of text reiterating what s’mores are, what people typically do with them after they make them, where they make them and why, what time of year this usually happens, and what time of day. There will also be so! Many! Filler! Text! Adjectives! And also adverbs. Some adjectives and adverbs will mean the same thing.

Continue reading →

Dinner

/ sweetsaraline

The stew slides out of the can with a schlurrrrrrrrp. It retains a cylindrical shape until I smash it up with a wooden spoon. Beige, orange, and brown cubes with rounded corners swim in a brown puddle. That’s the potatoes, carrots, and meat. The beef is made of highly processed hamburger meat, ground up again and again before being pressed into a shape.

I know that it is ready when the stew sizzles and spits.

I take the French fries out of the oven. I scoop some onto a plate and I dump the stew on top of the French fries. I set the plate down in front of my surprised son.

“My dad used to make this for me when I was a kid,” I tell him.

“Oh.” He pauses to take a hesitant bite, and then he says, “Did you like this when you were a kid?”